Good morning, white people.

I have to take back some recent statements I have made on this channel about music discourse. I have come out publicly and said that it's not maybe in the state that it used to be. But I woke up the other day, logged on to Twitter.net, and was instantaneously proven wrong.

Because the hot topic of discussion in the rap world that has really taken the genre by storm is the White Rapper Mount Rushmore. Say that five times fast. White Rapper Mount Rushmore, White Rapper Mount Rushmore, White Rapper Mount Rushmore, White Rapper Mount... Fuck. White Rapper Mount Rushmore, White Rapper... I bet Eminem could say it.

God, if that turns up in a bar on a future Eminem album, I'm going to slap myself across the face in the review. I'm going to slap myself in the face. I'm trusting everyone in the comments here to hold me to that.

But yeah, when it comes to general social media discourse about particular, I don't know, fields of content creation, we often rank things or talk about groupings of the best of things. One of the formats that occasionally will take is a Mount Rushmore-style meme or image where these are the four best in a given thing.

And generally speaking, there are a lot of rap Mount Rushmore conversations out there about who the best rappers are of all time, who are the best, generally speaking. And understandably so, because of his success and artistry, history and a unique approach to leersism and flow and everything else, when it comes to these general rap Mount Rushmores, of course, like Eminem often will get included.

In many respects, undeniably, he is one of the most successful and best rappers living today. Would he be on my rap Mount Rushmore? Probably no, but I feel like he's a totally sensible pick for any genuine rap fans' Mount Rushmore.

Now, you would think white people having one of those spots on lock for the most part, despite it being a genre that they did not create and often are not very... What's the word I'm using here? They don't usually contribute to the genre in a very positive way, looking at you, Tom MacDonald.

So again, to have Eminem there being a viable pick should be enough. Okay, we could pat ourselves on the back, I guess. If that's really the thing that matters to you, as a client. No, I can't say that. I can't say client.

But no, having Eminem be a viable pick there is simply not enough. We must come up with our own white rapper Mount Rushmore, and do what is essentially here grading on a curve. Because now across social media, I've seen numerous iterations of these white rapper Mount Rushmores. Most of the pics on them wouldn't land anywhere near anybody's general rap Mount Rushmore. Why do we have to make it a remedial category where the white people are allowed to climb up the ladder because we've eliminated all the much better competition?

The biggest one that I've seen shared around over and over and over features Russ. Also Paul Wall, which I like Paul Wall. When it comes to Dirty South type shit, he certainly contributed a fair amount of respectable records. He seems to actually live and eat and breathe the culture and has a lot of respect for and respect from artists who are in that Southern hip hop lane. As a white guy, from what I've seen, he doesn't operate within the culture in a way that is weird or negative. Maybe I'm wrong about that. But if we were to make a, I don't know, Southern hip hop Mount Rushmore, for example, musically speaking, Paul wouldn't even land anywhere near those four spots.

There's Mac Miller, which I think is a very respectable placement, especially when it comes to of hip hop fans who are my age and younger. He means a lot to those generations and provably came out with a lot of impactful and great records, was really a guy who was about his craft. Totally respected, too. But I feel like a part of the reason that is the case is that he would never endorse something like this.

"It's a touchy subject, especially with everything else going on in the world. You know what I mean? It's like, white rappers don't look like the tightest people when there's all these horrible things going on in the world. You know what I'm saying? It doesn't look tight." - Mac Miller

He would know intuitively how bad of a look something like this is and how weird and tone-deaf it is. And honestly, this is not the only version of this image that has been floating around the internet.

There's one over here which is even more disturbing that features Yelawolf. He looks like Scott Stapp in this image. Yeah, all these pictures are AI slop, by the way, and a lot of them barely even visually represent the artist who were supposed to be on the damn Mount Rushmore.

Like, Mac Miller is also on this Mount Rushmore, but he doesn't even look like Mac Miller. He looks like, I don't know, a frat bro with a receding hairline. No hate on the baldies out there as a fellow melon myself, but that is not Mac Miller. And why is Lil Peep's goddamn head square?

Yeah, here's another one where it's four Eminems but maybe only two of them max fully look like Eminem.

Okay, this one here has Lil Peep on it, too, where he actually does look like Lil Peep. But also on top of that, there's Post Malone and even more offensively, MGK. Again, how are we not grading on a curve here?

This is grading on a curve. And you know what? The person who made this one isn't the only individual who thinks MGK should be on this White Rapper Mount Rushmore. Yeah, apparently, MGK thinks that, too, because he tweeted with these Mount Rushmore images floating around.

me not on the white rapper mt rushmore is blasphemy https://t.co/Pe5GLcJnTi

— mgk (@machinegunkelly) April 14, 2025

It's blasphemy that I'm not on the White Rapper Mount Rushmore. Yeah, because MGK really wants to be side by side with the guy who lyrically bullied him so hard that he had to change genres.

Okay, this one has Action Bronson on it, and maybe that is a bit more of a sensible pick, but there's John Cena, too.

Plus, on top of it, there is the part of this discourse that I could get into, though I do think it would be in bad taste, that if we actually were ranking a bunch of white rappers on, I don't know, their technical and artistic skill here, where the hell are the Aesop Rock placements? I don't know, the El-P placements?

I have seen some people responding to this conversation in that way, but in the shape this discourse is taking, even that manages to be cringe. Here's an image where the choices are a little bit more left field.

Now, before we talk about the list here, let's do a bit of a guessing game. Aside from Eminem, who the fuck do you think these three other people are? I did just give away one of them, but before we get into their identities, why did two of them have orange hair?

Okay, and obviously, one of them is Aesop Rock, but why does he look like a girl on TikTok who ruined her bangs? If you couldn't already guess, the other two individuals in this image are Lil Wyte and Eyedea, which maybe that's Lil Wyte's cousin on a good day.

All right, I'm going to stop here because this needs to stop. And also this format doesn't really have the ability to account for the Beastie Boys, as it's supposed to be four individual guys. And what are we supposed to do with them? They're a trio. Do we have them all molded together onto one single head, like on the front cover of that Queen album, The Miracle?

But with that being said, yeah, in the comments, let me know. Who's on your White Rapper Mount Rushmore? And can you say it five times fast?

You're the best.

Fantano, White Rapper Mount Rushmore. Forever.