Hey, everyone. Anthony Fantano here, the internet's busiest music nerd.

Most disappointed music nerd, really. And truth be told, the disappointment I'm feeling is with myself. These might be unrealistic expectations, but I do my best to try to keep my finger on the pulse with music. I'm just one guy, unfortunately. I can't listen to or cover everything. So albums and projects are going to inevitably inevitably fall through the cracks for me here and there.

Yeah, it happens all the time, but I feel like this particular instance of it is just too egregious to ignore. And I have to come on camera here and apologize directly to you for not reviewing a particular album that in recent days has proven itself to be one of the most significant releases of really the past 10 years. And I failed.

I didn't review the project, and at this point, it just feels so in the past now to just do a normal, regular, formal review for it. I dropped the ball. I feel like there's not really any coming back from this one. The best I can do to make up for this egregious mistake is come on camera here, apologize, and do my best to talk about the album now.

Now, some of you guys who are really in the know with music, most likely already know what record I am talking about. I mean, this has been a massive cultural splash ever since this album dropped, and it's a country album. I don't review a lot of country records every year, but this particular country album has really shaken up the industry.

For example, when news of this album being in the works became public knowledge, artists like Beyoncé and Post Malone put out their own country records to try to beat these guys to the punch and not look like posers and sellouts, and people are just chasing a trend. The production and instrumentation and feature list on this record is really true to the genre. Excellent, detailed, rustic, and wholly and completely authentic. It's really caused a cultural reset, getting a lot of people to rethink, what is it exactly I want from my country music.

And also on top of that, rumor has it that other established artists in the genre are completely melting down and losing their minds because they're seeing their careers just slip through their fingers. There's only one group I could be talking about here at this point, you guys already know, and that's The Wiggles.

Yes, multi-genre, multi-generation, Australian hit makers The Wiggles, who were very safely in their own creative and stylistic lane for a long time, but with this new record, they have completely branched out fully into country music. Yes, this new Wiggles album is out. I didn't review it, and it's a massive record.

Honestly, when it came out, it was such a surprise as far as the genre change, the feature list, and the amount of tracks that, frankly, I was just threatened by it. I was scared to review it. I was scared to address it, especially since a lot of the music on this thing is fantastic to the point where it's difficult to put into words. And I just didn't really feel up to the task because there's just so much mind-blowing material in this tracklist, be it the opening track, which is a ground-breaking country pop EDM fusion that is on the level of genius and cultural splash as "Cotton Eye Joe". We're going to be singing this one for generations.

Then after that, "Counting 1 to 5" is not only a very helpful song about counting, but it is an ingenious revision of Dolly Parton's classic hit, 9 to 5. And just so you know, the Wiggles aren't just like, ripping Dolly Parton off. She does a song with them immediately after proving on the song "Friends". They're actually friends. They're really friends. How many artists are actually friends with the features on in their record. There's so many artists who do features with artists who they hate and they think are terrible. But Dolly Parton and The Wiggles are actually friends with each other. And The Wiggles getting the Dolly Parton endorsement, that is like the queen knighting you. And there are a few artists who have gotten that accolade.

Following this, we have "We're the Cowboys". This song just oozes pure country authenticity. When Simon is singing about being a cowboy on this track, you really feel it. You're like, damn, this guy's a cowboy. This guy is a cowboy. Then on track seven, as if the record couldn't get more versatile, we have "Hats, Boots, Ride!" where the group is doing one of these country snapbeat type tunes with some sequence grooves, some trap high hats, and they're sounding amazing doing it.

Like, pretty much every song that comes out in the country world that has taken on this sound, this vibe is trash, it's garbage, it's terrible, it's the worst thing to ever happen. The country music, stop doing it. It's annoying. But the Wiggles, like, worked with the same formula, and it's genius. They fixed it. It's actually palatable. It doesn't make you want to throw up in my mouth and swallow it.

Now, the Wiggles are not new to the game. They're true to the game. And they remind us of this by doing, again, ingeniously, like an awesome move on this. Do country versions of your classic influential hits like "Rock-A-Bye Your Bear", "Big Red Car", instead of "Big Red Car", it's "Big Red Ute", and some other tracks, too.

It's great at this point that the Wiggles have the creativity and the versatility to switch genres, hardcore in the way that they have on this record, do it so well, but also have that history, have that discography to pull back from and be like, you know what? We're just going to do our old songs country style. It's going to be amazing. Everything's going to freak out, and they're freaking out.

The 11th song on the record, "Standing in Line", is one of many tracks on the album that are not only beautiful from a musical standpoint but really helpful as far as the messaging goes. Ultra relatable, too, because we all have to stand in lines. It sucks, it's annoying, and we could all use help and encouragement with learning how to better do that and just have patience. We live in a very impatient world, and the Wiggles know that, which is why they wrote this song and delivered it unto us like the Ten Commandments.

Further into the record, not only do we have Wiggles O.G. Anthony taking some lead vocals on "Cowboys and Cowgirls" and sounding amazing in the process, I love the gender inclusion of that track. On top of it, on 17, we have "We Pack the Ute and Go Camping", a total camping anthem with a key change. Who is doing that in the country world now? Plus, "Here Comes the Chicken" with the real life chicken sounds, the bawk, bawk, bawk, bawk. Also, again, another thing I feel like a lot of country artists are afraid to do now. There's no sense of place in country anymore. The Wiggles are doing it. When I listen to this track, I feel like I'm on the farm, and speaking Farm.

On track 19, mind-blowing track, mind-blowing, "Someone Left the Gate Open". This song is all about the gate being left open on the farm. Animals get out. They're exploring the city. It's obviously an Animal Farm-type allegory, very no gods, no masters, narratively speaking. The Wiggles said, you have nothing to lose but your chains.

More relatable anthems on the back end of the record, "It's Tough Being Three Years Old", which I know I have a lot of younger viewers in my audience who are like, what the heck is this about? That's probably not true. That's crap. Look, I understand now you're two years old, you're one year old, but you'll understand once you turn three, everything that this song is about, it's going to hit you and you'll be like, oh, man, he was right. The song was right.

Another moment on the record that to me works as a really effective reference point is the country version of "La Cucaracha", which is a tune all about sounds that farm animals make, which sometimes, I'm going to be honest, I get that. So to have this song and just be able to put it on, just be like, okay, what sound does a horse make? What sound does a cow make? I have this song to go back to really conveniently whenever I need a refresher on that.

Now, Dolly Parton I said also appears on the back end of this record, two features on this album, which is important because she follows up with the band with the song "We Will Always Be Friends", which is really good because that song, "Friends", came very early in the album, and the record is so long. It's 32 tracks long. By the time the album is almost done, I've forgotten they were friends. So this track popping in at this point is great because it's like, oh, it's a reminder. It's a callback. It's like, oh, they're still... Oh, wow. After this really long album, They're still friends. I can't believe it. Most friendships don't even last 30 minutes, much less an hour. So the fact that the wiggles came back and then we're like, hey, don't forget, us and Dolly, we're still tight like that.

The last two songs on the record, they don't matter. It's a 10 out of 10. It's a 10 out of 10 album. This album is a 10. It's better than Madvillainy. It's better than Abbey Road. It's better than everything ever released by any country artist ever, including Johnny Cash and even Garth Brooks little weird Chris Gaines' musical sidequest, where he was like, oh, I'm not going to do country. I'm going to do rock. But I'm going to count that, too. Even that album, this record is better than that. Look, I don't care how many Chris Gaines fans get angry in the comments. This record is better than that.

I'll go as far as to say this album is better than every song ever released by Hootie and the Blowfish. The Wiggles with this record are running the country game, and they've given us so many songs to listen to. We really don't need to stop listening to this album for the next 10 years when it comes to country music. You have 30 country songs on here. You have 30 country songs, how many country songs do you need over a period of a decad? You only need like 30. The Wiggles have given it to you. They've given you the exact amount of country songs you need for the next 10 years. No country artist should be releasing anything from now until 2035.

Unfortunately, I didn't review the album, and I suck for not reviewing the album. And I apologize for not reviewing it. It's just a stellar record, and I'm probably just going to quit reviewing because to miss a record like this and not cover it and not celebrate it upon release and just miss out on that opportunity is just something that I'm going to hang my head in shame over for the rest of my life. I'm over. I'm done. I'm cooked. I'm finito. And that's really all there is to it.

Well, that's going to be it, guys. You're the best. Let me know in the comments what you think of this album, how it's changed your life would be great. Let me know in the comments exactly how this album changed your life in detail. That would be great.

Anthony Fantano, The Wiggles. Forever.