Sharing what he describes as a piece of "musical insider information," Beastie Boys member Ad-Rock tells the story of how he, under the influence of "the pot", wanted to listen to his gold record of Paul's Boutique. But in cracking open the glass case, he may have inadvertently cracked open an industrywide conspiracy.
One would assume that the gold records artists are presented with contain their own music, but as The Beastie Boys discovered, what you see might not be what you get. Ad-Rock and Mike D appeared on Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend this week to set it straight:
The Scene of the Crime
Who: The Beastie Boys.
Where: Their California Studio
When: A long time ago
Ad-Rock recalled admiring their golden record of Paul's Boutique on the wall - plaque commemorating the album surpassing 500,000 sales, a monument to their innovation. That is, until Ad-Rock noticed something was off. "I was looking at the actual gold record and it only had four songs on it," he recounted.
Interesting, considering any seasoned Beastie Boys listener will tell you that Paul's Boutique contains 15 tracks - 23 if you count certain releases that break up the nine individual sections of "B-Boy Bouillabaisse". Either way, 15 and 23 are both more than four.
"I was looking at the actual gold record and it only had four songs on it."
Their backs against the wall, The Beastie Boys were left with no choice but to open up the record and investigate further. "Open it, like, broke the glass and took the record out of the thing" Mike D clarified. It is unknown at this time what tool was used to break the glass.
After extricating the golden record from its glass casing, they placed it on a turntable to give it a spin. Expecting to hear the sultry Fender Rhodes tones at the start of "To All the Girls", The Beastie Boys listened, but what they heard was shocking. The plaque that read Paul's Boutique turned out to be something of a mirage.
Barry Manilow. Feelings. Some other shit.
"It was somebody doing piano versions of Barry Manilow. Like, Feelings. Just some other shit," Adam "Ad-Rock" Horovitz alleges.
It's not clear if the aforementioned Feelings is an abbreviation of Manilow's 1975 song "Tryin’ to Get the Feeling Again", or perhaps the song by Morris Albert.
The Beastie Boys were reportedly unable to identify the specific artist and album, but by their account, it was most certainly not Paul's Boutique.
How deep does this go?
After learning the details of the incident, Conan, like any good talk show host, had questions.
"This should lead to a quiz show kind of investigation, cause I think all gold records need to be examined." said O'Brien. "They all need to be recalled, and you should check them out because it's probably not their record."
Conan is of course referencing the 1950s quiz show scandals, where producers were caught feeding contestants answers in order to to fix the games. Congress became involved and had to amend the Communications Act of 1934 to make this activity legally prohibited.
The Beastie Boys would appear on MTV's The Mating Game in 1987, and the producers did not feed them answers thanks to the amendment made by congress.
There is no congressional oversight on gold records at the time of writing.
"This should lead to an investigation."
Although it's unclear how severe and widespread this issue is, and whether or not it would be tantamount to the 1950s quiz show scheme, it begs the question: If congress needs to get involved, who would they go after?
The RIAA
The Recording Industry Association of America awards plaques to record labels to commemorate an album excelling in sales. Their criteria is as follows:
- 500,000 units: Gold album
- 1,000,000 units: Platinum album
- 2,000,000 units: Multi-Platinum album
- 10,000,000 units: Diamond album
It's important to note that these awards are not automatic, record labels must request the RIAA to conduct an audit. Only once the audit is completed and the sales are verified can the record label receive their award.
From Ad-Rock's story, we know that Paul's Boutique reached at least 500,000 sales, but according to Wikipedia, the album is certified double platinum.
The potential motive for replacing Paul's Boutique with an unknown piano album of Barry Manilow covers is unclear at the time of writing.
Are there other victims?
"I'd like to think that for, you know, Barbara Streisand, Donna Summer, like a real mega star, that it was actually their record." adds Mike D.
The RIAA reports that Streisand has the most certified gold or higher albums out of any female artist with a total of 52. If what The Beastie Boys are alleging is true, that is 52 potential fraudulent records among us, hiding under the guise of beloved Streisand hits.
The Beastie Boys' stats aren't quite as impressive, their first studio album, Licensed to Ill, reached diamond certification in 2015, making it their second diamond (founding member Mike D, born Michael Diamond, being the first). Their albums, Check Your Head, Hello Nasty, Ill Communication, and To the 5 Boroughs have all achieved platinum certification or higher as well.
Mike D implored Conan to use his industry pull to encourage other musicians to find out if they've been affected. "Next time, say, Lady Gaga is here, you could really urge her to do the same"
The situation is still developing, but as more details UNFOLD, Mike D wants us to remember who was at the center of all this.
"We were the sleuths that uncovered this incredible crime ring."
Simple mistake? Or sabotage? Hear the full story below:
What do you think?
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